Almost without sound you round the corner and then there you are: I turn like the gears of a clock, compelled beyond resistance and Again, I am confronted with a circumstance that defies reason: you Smile and roll your eyes as I try and fail To show you the course of heartblood in me As it traces past my loins, toward my feet and then out, Tributary to the wide and swift current, a glacier poured, Almost silent, irresistible, sliding to the sea. Mere belonging, my belonging is mere. I was, become, and am, a smear On a canvas; round strokes rich with indigo thick pigment and Thin yolk yellow squeaks hold court with angry mud and laser red; Rusty blood blameworthy waters hopeful green, but The Painter cannot be found. The painter is found In silence. There is no painter, no paint. But there is color and sorrow. And hope. There is hope. Hope and sorrow are lovers, one inside the other, Moving deeply. So entangled they are, hope and sorrow, that only one Can be seen at a time. Bodies mangled by choices, smashed by meaning, somehow stand And move, not knowing They’re already rotting. Fear and Reason throw gasoline and acid at the bodies Never seeing the children they doom to suttee for it. Fear and Reason, turns out, can’t see children. I can, because of you, and because of you I do my best To dry their eyes and hold them, shivered, sobbing. Fear and Reason throw gasoline and acid into a mirror. Because of you, tomorrow I will hold them, too.

Oil Painting
©2021 Miroslava Panayotova
Poetry ©2023 Michael J. DeValve
All rights reserved

Michael J. DeValve…
…is an assistant professor in the Department of Criminal Justice at Bridgewater State University. Michael’s scholarly focus is love and justice. His works include A Different Justice: Love and the future of criminal justice practice in America(2015),A Unified Theory of Justice and Crime: Justice that love gives(2018), and Personal Ethics and Ordinary Heroes:The social context of morality(2021),and articles in Contemporary Justice Review, Critical Criminology,Police Quarterly, and the Journal of Theoretical and Philosophical Criminology.